Does anyone else out there have a problem of not uh... consuming all of the produce they purchase, or am I the only one? Am I the only one who stands at Costco, looking at all of earth's bounty, being overly optimistic that I will actually eat any of it?
As the good Lord intended us to do, RW eats fruit like candy. I eat candy like candy. I'm not really one of those people who feels good about substituting an apple for a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. However, I always do have good intentions, so I load up my grocery cart with cartons of apples, oranges, grapes - whatever looks good and fills me with healthy hopes and dreams (in the spirit of keepin' it real, serious emphasis on dreams) at the moment.
Although RW certainly does his share, it's slightly difficult for one person to eat an entire Costco load of apples, oranges and grapes all on his own, although he gives it a valiant effort:
RW: [peeling his third orange of the day] "These are good oranges."
ME: "I KNOW! Aren't they?!"
RW: "Have you actually had any?"
ME: "No."
And that's right about the time that RW (understandably) slips into lecture mode, not yet totally sure if this lecture he wishes to focus on the merits of good health or the ethics of throwing food away. If I'm really fortunate, he'll fire up the ol' mental lesson plans and give me both.
Knowing that I had yet to do my part on the bananas laying (lying? I can never remember, but seeing as bananas don't lie, I went with laying) on the counter, I decided I should eat one. Apparently I had under-estimated the time they had been happily parked in my kitchen, because as I grabbed the entire bunch by the.. well.. I'm going to call it the banana handle..., this is what occurred:
I was momentarily stunned, and stood and stared at it. I can't say that has ever happened to me before. It's an impressive break though, don't you think?
I promptly relocated the bananas to the freezer where they shall languish on in the frozen tundra of good intentions until I get an urge to make some banana bread. Meanwhile, let's not mention this to RW. He may just, well... go bananas.